What Time to Run?

I am falling behind in blogging Juneathon, so need to catch-up and report a fail.

Saturday

The plan was a 12k run at easy pace, which was achieved. I am always pleased when this happens because, being a person whose self discipline lacks a certain amount of iron, I am never quite sure I will follow through with my intentions. This time I did so but not without an awful lot of humming and hawing - it was late afternoon before I got out of the door.

'What time to run?' is an interesting question. All the science tells us that or circadian rhythms favour the afternoon for exercise. Apparently it is better if we do our mental work first thing in the morning whilst leaving physical exertion for later as our bodies work more efficiently when they are fully warmed up. Certainly most athletic world records are broken in the afternoon (though that might well be influenced by most athletic meets being at that time) and when Chris Boardman, who was famous for leaving no scientific stone unturned, broke the hour cycling record he was careful to timetable the attempt for teatime. However psychology is a big factor. If I do not get out fairly promptly in the morning I tend to mess around for most of the day, procrastinating, wasting time and sometimes not going at all. I really need to get out before I can think about it.

Saturday was an example. The morning priority was food shopping rather than running ( because of the need for lunch), but after that there was coffee, then waiting till after lunch, followed by some reading, and some fettling, before I realised if I did not go it would be dinner time and I would miss the run.

When I got out I still found myself distracted. About 15 minutes in I passed a cricket game and stopped to have a look. I sat down on the grassy bank and was overcome by the feeling of idle contentment that comes from cricket on a warm afternoon. I love the age range in local teams from boys to grizzled veterans, though predominantly the teams are middle aged . ('Come on boys' the captain yelled to encourage his team but boyhood was a distant memory for most of them). I also love the rhythm of the game, which is almost hypnotic.

I spent far too much time watching the last wicket partnership and so my 12k run was therefore more of a 2.5, 9.5 effort. Anyway I eventually got going and was quite pleased because the route featured a hill and a bit of variety from running by the canal.

Sunday

This was a fail as I spent the day painting and decorating. My intention was to do some yoga afterwards but I felt weary and could not be bothered.

If I am going to keep my Juneathon streak going I am going to have to reclassify decorating as exercise, but I am not fully convinced.


Juneathon Day 13 stats

Run distance: 12k
Run time: 1 hr 10min

To be Demolished

This is a sad but inevitable picture - the destruction of a relic of our industrial history - a cradle of modern paper making. The Frogmore Mill was the first to produce continuous papers using the Fourdrinier method, in 1803, whilst in 1809, in a mill a few hundred yards away, John Dickinson started to produce continuous paper using cylinders. In 1811 John Dickinson bought this place, Nash Mills and paper was produced here until 2006 but since that time it has been empty.

There are plans to use the land for a housing development but I don't know what is happening now the property market has collapsed. As you can see from the picture there has been some demolition but it looks as if it has been frozen - there is no sign of activity and everything looks too tidy. In which case the building will just rot for a period. What has been exposed though is the way the canal went into the factory and the romantic in me rather likes the reminder of how things used to be with the canal being used as the major freight route, with the finished paper being taken right into the heart of London to a depot in Kings Cross.

I like the old brick walls of our industrial path and I want to pass them when running by the canal. They are what we have come from and once they are turned into housing those roots will have been pulled out. However something must be done when a building is no longer useful. Land needs to be redeveloped.

We already have a paper making museum at the Frogmore Mill but unfortunately that is also being hit by the recession, as their business model relies on the sale of land for development. I hope it survives as it would be too, too sad to lose this connection with the past. After all it is no small thing to be able to put a stake in the ground and say 'something of significance happened here.'

All this is a long winded way of saying I went for a run today to Nash Mills, which I do frequently. It is after all my stock run .

Juneathon Day 12 stats:

Run Distance: 10k
Time running: 54 min

Away Days

Yesterday I went to London and what a good day to choose when there was a Tube strike. The result was that the roads were completely gummed up with traffic and so the buses were useless as well . So I walked - everywhere. I don't know how many miles in total but there was an awful lot of wandering round, so that must count for Juneathon.

Before I left in the morning I had forgotten about the strike so took out some exercise insurance by running round the park before breakfast. Only 2 k but nevertheless a run.

In the evening I went to the theatre with my daughter and saw All's Well That Ends Well, at the National. One of the more rarely performed Shakespeare plays (in fact I have never seen it) and I can understand why. The story is flimsy, like a fable but without a fable's moral certainty. The male lead has a weak and unpleasant character and therefore you are not even sure it's a good ending when the heroine ends up with him. Nevertheless it was an excellent production. I liked the way they emphasised the fairy tale nature of the story, with a set that looked as if it was designed by Jan Pienkowski and even the seduction switch shown as silhouettes on a cotton sheet.

Anyway it was back quite late but up early in the morning to drive to Manchester. There and back in a day is very tiring and I do not know how lorry drivers do this for a living. Too much driving makes me feel sleepy. But you can't sleep if it is Juneathon.

Although I did not leap out and run I did at least do some yoga. I do not feel that I am making any progress (unlike all you press-up people) as I am still as stiff as ever but the exercises had the remarkable effect of making me feel much more alert

Juneathon 10 stats:

Run distance: 2k
Time: 11 min
Walk: lots

Juneathon 11 stats:
Yoga: 20min

Juneathon 8&9

This is a footpath/cyclepath under the M1 and is a big improvement - as it should be. If you are going to £21 million a mile widening the road there ought to be some benefit.

It is on the Nicky Line, which used to be a rail link between Hemel Hempstead and Harpenden but was opened as a footpath in 1985. Previously the tunnel was horrible - dark, rutted and quite scary. Now there is a flat gravel surface with lights and I don't feel depressed when I run through it. It is still a bit eerie though because the noise of your foot as it scratches away the gravel echoes off the corrugated casing and your footfall sounds very loud.

Today I ran it as an out and back and it was a pleasantly peaceful . In fact I hardly saw anybody, just two cyclists, three runners, and four walkers. I actually prefer more activity and it is one of the reasons why my stock runs tend to be along the canal rather than here - on the canal something is always happening and every day is different. When you are running by yourself, for a longish time, distractions are always welcome.

One of the people I did meet managed to make me feel inadequate again (actually not a tremendously difficult thing to do). He was a runner who pulled-up and so I asked him how he was doing. He told me it was the achilles, which was a problem because he had a race on Sunday. I commiserated and walked with him for a bit during which time I discovered that the race was one of several triathlon he had plannned for the year, including a double ironman! I have no idea how people do a standard ironman never mind doubling the distance. It is beyond my imagination . He said he did it last year and it took him 29 hours - Bloody Hell!

So I carried on my merry way, content with the fact that I was running 22 km and trying not to think of the endurance of others.

I have combined my report for days 8 & 9 due the fact that yesterday was a yoga day, so there was nothing much to say.


Juneathon Day 8 stats:

Homemade Yoga: 30 min

Juneathon Day 9 stats

Run distance: 22.25 km
Time running: 2hrs 4 min
Running music: none
Recovery music: Mark Lanagan I'll Take care of You (first track on the album is here)

The Pleasure of Play

Yesterday I looked at the weather forecast and it showed grey clouds and heavy rain. Sure enough when I woke up it was both wet and cold, so a good day for the gym.

I very rarely go to the on Sunday and was quite surprised at how crowded it was. The pool was particularly full, and as the treadmills overlook the swimmers, this was quite diverting. There are as many variations in styles of swimming as there are of running but many of them seem incredibly inefficient. I know I am in no position to talk because I am not much of a swimmer but looking down from above you can clearly see those who really fight the water. One girl swam the crawl without getting her hair wet (I have no idea how this is possible as her body must have been at about 30 degrees to the surface), someone else swam the breaststroke with their body at an angle to the direction of travel and a man swam crawl with a round arm style that looked like a butterfly cross. They must have all worked really hard to get from one end of the pool to the other, whilst others managed to keep their body in a straight line and cleave through the water much more easily.

The contrast in swimming efficiency is very stark but it made me think about running style and how keeping your body in line is a similarly advantage. One of my New year Resolutions was to be more upright and so on all my slow runs I spend a fair amount of time thinking about form, about being balanced, looking ahead and not leaning. I tell myself to let the legs feel loose, as if they were turning over rather than pushing. I have no real idea as to whether this actually helps my form but constantly telling myself to be easy helps my attitude as it is only a small jump from ease to enjoyment.

When I came out of the gym the sky was blue with white clouds - good running weather. Ah well!

But my time had not been wasted and I felt pretty good. On my walk back I passed some sort of event where there was a trampoline catapult. I loved looking at how some of the kids really enjoyed bouncing up so high. It takes children to remind you of the pleasures of play.

Juneathon, I think, is just a reminder to play every day.

Juneathon Day 7 stats:

Run: 6.5k
Resistance machines: back, abs, pectoral fly, arm press, shoulder press, static rower
Stretches
Time 1 hour 15 min.

Same Route - Different Run

What a grey, damp day.

The fun discovery of my run was that they still play bowls in the wet. I thought it was a bit like cricket and they retired to the club house for tea and cake if it was raining but no! They have their own special wet weather clothes and they carry-on with stoicism. I was very impressed and also struck by the idea that somewhere there must be a supplier of white anoraks or perhaps it is a sideline for the makers of decontamination suits. Who knows.

For every obsession there is an associated industry. We runners spend a disproportionate amount of time thinking about types, makes and models of shoes, cyclists can swoon at the beauty of an exotic frame or high end components, and photographers obsess about the features of cameras or identify with their brand. For each there is a specialist shop where the person serving and the customer share the same enthusiasm . Conversations are had and there is a sociability to the commercial exchange. They are valuable places.

My run today was over the same route as yesterday (as I said it is my stock run) but it was different. Yesterday was more testing in that it consisted of faster surge whereby I gradually increased my pace until I was breathless and then eased right back to get my heart rate down before increasing the pace again. Today the idea was to run easily and steadily at a relaxed pace. The result was that I took 5 minutes longer with an average heart rate that was 4 beats less.

Objective achieved.

Juneathon Day 6 stats:

Distance: 10k
Time: 60min

Stock Run

When I set out my intention was to take a photo of Nash Mill being demolished - to keep some sort of record of the changes being made and write a little about the history of paper making (obviously a staple for any running blog). But that will have to wait. I passed a barge with a dog sitting so calmly by the tiller that he looked like a boat owner enjoying a moment of peace of quiet. It had to be today's picture as I am unlikely to see it again.

This is what I like about my route - every time I run it there are new things to see. Some of the boats are familiar but others are new and there are always different people passing by. I think it is important for stock runs to have enough variety so stop them becoming boring, which is why I feel lucky to have a nearby canal.

Juneathon Day 5 stats:

Running time - 55 min
Distance - 10k

The Cows are in the Meadow

One of the opportunities of Juneathon is to use it as an excuse to try new things. Most people seem to have embraced the idea of the 100 press-up, 200 sit-up challenge and I am full of admiration as that seems quite hard. But my need is for more flexibility and balance; hence I will be trying yoga.

I am not a total novice as I took a class a few years ago but since then my stretching regime has been none too impressive and I remain rather stiff, especially the hamstrings. Work needs to be done otherwise I will continue to contract into myself and become a little ball.

I actually started last week and went to a class last Thursday and was quite impressed by how different it was from my previous classes i.e. the change from traditional Hatha to Ashtanga. I did not realise the sun could be saluted so much and I ended up watching the beads of sweat drip from my forehead onto the mat - that never used to happen.

Today I went for my second class but it was cancelled. What to do? If it had not been Juneathon I would have shrugged my shoulders and thought nothing more about it but I had programmed this as my main activity of the day. So I had to unroll my mat in the lounge and try construct my own session from The Runner's Yoga Book (useful because it recognises the fact that runners tend to be stiff and shows a number of less testing modifications to the classic poses). For some reason I found it very difficult to keep my focus but nevertheless I struggled on for 30 minutes before deciding that that was enough.

I also went for a cycle ride with the intention of taking some photos of the Belted Galloway cows which usually gaze at Boxmoor. They are wonderfully gentle beasts who pay very little attention to the people who walk on the footpaths that criss-cross the meadow (or even idiots with a camera kneeling in front of them).

Juneathon Day 4 stats:

Homemade Yoga: 30 min
Cycling distance: 7 miles
Cycling time: 40 min

A Stroll in the Woods

This morning the scales showed I had lost 3lbs, which for one small moment I thought was good news before I remembered that I gave blood yesterday. So this is my weight with an empty arm.

As exercising with too little blood is not a good idea I needed find something gentler that would nevertheless count towards Juneathon. Perhaps a walk in the woods?

I am lucky because Ashridge is near and it is one of my favourite places, somewhere that always refreshes . Beech, oak and birch, deer and who knows how many birds, away from the main paths everything is tranquil. Sometimes when I feel completely alone I like to stand completely still, just listening and looking. I wish I could identify birds by their song but I have no idea. All I hear is the texture of interweaving calls and the best I can do is to try to count the number of different songs. At moments like this time passes, but I cannot stay too long or it would not count as a Juneathon.  One has to stride on.

In the distance I see a patch of blue flowers and think it unusual because bluebells should be finished but getting closer is see the flowers are quite different. The petals start as blue and bell-like but are then forced apart as the green seed-bladder grows larger (if you click the picture to see a larger version, this can be seen more clearly).

I have no idea what the flower is so if anybody knows this inadequate naturalist would be pleased to hear from you.

Stats for Juneathon Day 3:
Time walking: 1 hour

Reasons to Love June

There are many reasons to love June. Not only is there the festivity of Juneathon and the communal warm that comes from a group of people supporting each other in their attempt to exercise each day, there is an explosion of flowers in gardens and meadows, their colours offset by the still fresh greens of leaves and grass. Today's photo is posted for no other reason than I like the blowsiness of poppies. It comes from my garden so I certainly can't claim any exercise points for taking it, but it is more fun to look at than a treadmill.

Yes that is right today was a gym day. Even though I prefer running outside I go to the gym once or twice a week, both because I need some resistance exercise and I find the treadmill useful for, what I laughingly call, speed work. When running outside I am not mentally tough enough to sustain a pace when it becomes uncomfortable and automatically slip back to something just that little bit easier. With the treadmill you dial the speed and have to keep going, even if you end up hanging on.

So here are the stats for Juneathon Day 2:

Run - 7k
Resistance machines - abs crunch; pectoral fly, shoulder press, arm press, static rower, leg press
Stretches - those as well
Total time - 1 hour
Music: Robert Wyatt, Fleet Foxes

Juneathon Day 1

Tired of the old descriptions of the world,
The latest freed man rose at six and sat
On the edge of his bed. He said,
“I suppose there is
A doctrine to this landscape. Yet, having just
Escaped from the truth, the morning is color and mist,
Which is enough
From The Latest Freed Man by Wallace Stevens

Yes that was me rising early to look at the landscape, feeling like the latest freed man.

Yesterday was meant to be my long run but I over slept and dilly dallied around until it was far to hot to be out for over two hours . So I saved the long run for today with the idea of starting Juneathon with intent.

My plan for the rest of the month is to take my camera with me on every run and post a photo. Last year I had a rule of waiting until the midway break but this year I will be more relaxed and will look for things at any stage of the run. The change is necessary because I only have a small number of routes and do not want to endlessly repeat the same pictures.

Day 1 stats:
Time running 2hr 10min
Distance 23km
Music running: none
Music post run: Moondog

Nose to Nose

I like Winkwell. On one side of a very narrow lane is a boatyard always with a number of narrowboats either moored or being worked on, on the other is a pub snuggling into the landscape, with plenty of seating alongside the canal. What can be finer than sitting out on a summers day drinking beer and watching people at leisure passing-by on the footpath or in barges. The bridge adds to the fun because it it is electrically operated and swings open to let the boats through; and there is nothing like a piece of working machinery to awaken little boy within.

However the road is problem if there are cars going in opposite directions as passing is either impossible or awkward and the bridge is definitely only wide enough one. Today the problem was dramatic.

It started when I was crossing the bridge and I had just about reached the other side when I was met by an on-coming car. It did not slow down in the slightest, or make any other adjustment but carried on, going just a little bit too fast. I had to move quickly to one side to avoid being squished and as I was thinking dark thoughts about the manners of the driver I heard the crunchy tyre-noise of cars breaking very hard. The car that had passed me was stopped with its nose level with the other end of the bridge, two inches away was the nose of another car, which must also have been going too fast.

The driver of the car that had passed me (lets call him Fiat Man) jumped out and started swearing saying that he had the right of way because he was on the bridge. The other one (Chrysler Man) responded by saying that was stupid and it was more difficult for him to back up to the main road. They faced up to each other ; swearing. Chrysler Man was about 60, with grey hair and leathery skin and tough looking. He was solidly built with a gravelly London accent - imagine him being played by Ray Winston.

"If you want to fuck with me then you'd better be prepared to be wet. Because that is where'd you'd be - In The Water!" he said with utter conviction.

Although Fiat man was probably twenty years younger I didn't fancy his chances. He was agitated rather than threatening - all over the place. His clothes were odd , a polo top over what like his pyjama bottoms, and all in all he had the look of someone for whom life was becoming a bit much. He turned round took the keys out of the ignition and for one hugely pleasurable moment I thought he was going to hurl them into the water to spite everybody. Instead he just leaned over the railings and looked at the water - who knows what he was thinking.

The stand-off continued. Cars drove up and then turned round as they realised it would be quicker for them to take a loop. I had a brief chat with one of the nearby householders who shrugged his shoulders and went in. Everybody else alongside the canal was just looked-on, as I did. Then the running instinct cut-in and told me I couldn't be hang around any longer as I was only halfway and so I toddled off. For all I know they are still there.

When I started I was vaguely amused but after a couple of miles or so I started to think about my reaction and how it had been inadequate. I ought to have made some effort to mediate. The situation was stupid and eventually one of them would have to reverse to let the other through. It was only a matter of time and finding a way so neither of them would lose face. Perhaps I could have helped; perhaps not. I will never know because I did not try. This stems from a character trait - I am not much of a participant and do not instinctively rush forward. I do not involve myself enough with others. Much more I am the detached observer.

Running throws up many things and it shows you things about your character: how you face challenges, endure and overcome difficulties. In this case it put me in a place and showed me how I tend to react, or not to react, to things on the outside of my bubble. It gave me something else to think about.

(PS The photo is one from last year. This year the pub has a different sign)

Shoe review - Saucony Xodus

The exposure of the way MPs have used their expenses system shows how we all need to be very open about our dealings. So in that spirit I have to report that the shoes I am reviewing were given to me by the friendly people at Fitness Footwear.

Actually a review would have appeared far earlier if I had been compatible with New Balance but I don't think I am. The first pair of shoes I ordered arrived and looked rather handsome but were about half a size too small (At the time of ordering I did not know that New Balance come-up a little short). I sent them back for replacement only to find that that not only was that model was no longer available, neither was my second choice of model (I must have minority tastes). Luckily Fitness Footwear had started to stock Saucony and I have run in their shoes before and liked them.

I chose the Xodus multi-terrain shoes and as you can see from the photo they are also rather handsome, especially if you like bees. You can also see that the soles are not as aggressive as some tail shoes but as they are made from Vibram they are plenty grippy. In fact they are probably perfect for someone like me who is not an extreme fell runner, but justspends about 30% of running time off-road.

So how did they work out?

The answer is very well and I would give these shoes a big thumbs up. In fact I will pay them the highest compliment I can -when running, I completely forgot about them. Running is for thinking about other things. If you start to think about your kit it means there is something wrong and so far I have found nothing wrong with these shoes.

They manage a very good compromise between the cushioning required for running on the pavement (to reach the off-road bits) and the grip and responsiveness useful for a trail. Quite rightly the balance is more in favour of off-road and they are at their most comfortable on twisty rooty tracks and lumpy paths, where the footfall is very secure but they are also fine for a few miles on the road. Although I would not want to run a half marathon in them, that is not what they are designed for.

If I was to sum up: about the shoes I would say that they are very good at doing what they are meant to (I wish I could say the same about me). About Fitness Footwear I am very pleased that they have broadened their range. Each of the brands have a slightly different fit and feel and I think it is important to have the range from at least two manufacturers. For me Saucony fit just fine.

Compared to This Man I am a Bit of a Wuss

Well compared to a lot of people really, as I don't think I have more than a modicum of fortitude.  here the person in the photo (Andy) is showing-up my lack of endurance. He is one of the competitors in the Grand Union Canal Race from Birmingham to London -  145 mile long  to be completed within 45 hours.

I have no idea how they keep going for that amount of timewith no sleep. I'm sure I would start hallucinating or stumble into the water in the middle of the night, providing that I could reach the middle of the night (which I don't think I could). Yet these people just keep on going, putting one foot in front of another  not letting up.

This year must have been very. very tough because of the heat. My run was only 12 miles but I struggled towards the end, yet compared to these competitors I was doing no more than a jog around the block.

How do they do it?

Reviewing Resolutions

Now is the time to look back at my objectives for the year to see if I have made any progress. If I am on target then I can feel pleasantly smug but if not there is still time to stiffen the sinews and try harder.

Damn! I have just looked at the list and found I have done virtually nothing. I might have kept running but for the others there are just the teeny tiniest signs of progress. This is not good, especially as I really wanted to find some reason to feel the warm glow of self satisfaction. Instead I will have to look for a hair shirt in the wardrobe and sign up for an evening class in self mortification.

So I have not entered any races nor have I lost weight – then plans need to be made. The sad thing is I am already too late for booking a place in a couple of marathons I fancied. Both the new Forest and Abingdon are full already. This just shows the difference between me and a properly organised runner. A proper runner will sit down at the beginning of the year, pick out a number of races and then schedule the year around them. Me I have a vague idea that I will do a marathon in the autumn and will only think of the actual race much later. It never occurs to me that other people get up early and put their towels on the sun loungers

Nevertheless there will be a marathon and the shorter distance races can be worked around it. However losing weight requires a bit more resolve as it is all about attitude of mind. The principle is very simple: control of portions so that I only eat a moderate sized plateful at each meal, with a piece of fruit being the only snack allowed between meals. Eating slowly is one of the keys and if I do that I am more likely to feel happy with a smaller plate.

I believe in a gradual approach and only want to tweak quantities not exclude any type of food. After all eating is a sensual pleasure which should be celebrated. As a consequence I am prepared to take a long time to lose a stone. All I want is eat slightly fewer calories than I use each day. Sounds easy but it is actually quite difficult to do when training because the temptation is always to eat for 10k when I having run only 5. Nevertheless it can be done and now is as good a time to start as any.

Running in Literature iv: Mohawk

I had an idea for a series of posts called 'Running in literature'. Whenever I found a novel running was significant, or a non-running book that made some point about running, I would note it and make some comment. Unfortunately the weakness in this is the random nature of my reading and a lack of effort in searching out running references. As a result the series is sparse. Nevertheless things sometimes crop up especially if I can stretch the criteria a little to include small descriptions of someone running.

He is a large man, and while his movements are efficient in the narrow space behind the familiar lunch counter, he's lost and sluggish in open spaces. H runs the first fifty yards to the base of Hospital Hill, but when he starts up the grade he slows like a swamp bound dinosaur. .. Harry imagines that he is still running, but only his crazy arm jerks suggest rapid motion. Otherwise he looks like a fat comedian doing an impression of an Olympic walker, all hips an elbows. He thinks of all those childhood dreams where he was pursued by something nameless and fearsome, his legs heavy and rooted like tree trunks.

From Mohawk by Richard Russo.

I like the small observation at the beginning that Harry could move efficiently, and was perfectly adapted, in his day to day work but was lost in open spaces. I like the insight that we become moulded by our every day activities and specialisation, which makes us efficient also confines our abilities in other circumstances. I also like the observation that running is about being in open spaces as this is at the heart of its attraction for me. I love open spaces, hearing the birds, feeling the wind seeing the green of the trees and dark of the water, and most of all being surrounded by the variety of life. It is this reimder of life that makes me feel most alive.

Swine Flu

It is outside the scope of this blog to write about swine flu. I know a serious pandemic would have a great effect on running and that races and group runs would be cancelled. But the effect on running would be meaninglessly trivial compared to everything else, when all of our efforts would be concentrated on just trying to keep going.

That is why I am impressed by the efforts of the WHO and various governments to try to contain or minimise the effects of the disease. It is important they are monitoring the situation and have plans of action and that what they are doing is based on scientific work. It is not the overreaction of self-serving bureaucracies, as is asserted in this very depressing article by
Simon Jenkins.

Some of the endless speculation in the media might be a little hysterical but that is another matter. Their difficulty is that although there is a very clear risk of a serious event we do not as yet know what will happen. If we are lucky it will fizzle out into nothing but at the moment we do not know enough to make accurate predications and so we have to wait and watch and evaluate - the very things our 24 hour rolling news culture is ill equipped to do.

But there are good sources of information. There have been considered reports in the broadsheets and interesting programmes on the radio. However, for the first time, I am using a blog as my main source of information on a major story.
Effect Measure is written by senior public health scientist in America - let me recommend it to you

Adventure and Competence

Roni Horn once told me
that one of the Antarctic explorers said
To be having an adventure

is a sign of incompetence.
When I am feeling
at my most incompetent
as i do in Stykkisholmur
many a dark morning
walking into the wind

I try to conjure in mind
something that is the opposite of incompetence.
For example the egg.

This perfect form.
perfect content.
Perfect food.

In your dreams
said a more recent explorer (Anna Freud)
you can have your eggs cooked as perfectly as you want

but you cannot eat them.
Sometimes at night
when I can't sleep

because of the wind
I go and stand
in the library of glaciers.

I stand in another world.
Not the past not the future.
Not paradise not reality not

a dream.
An other competence.
Wild and constant.

From 'Wildly Constant' by Anne Carson.

There are differing meanings for the word adventure. I use it fairly loosely to describe a long run, cycle, or hike, or even just putting myself in a slightly challenging environment. Mostly my adventures are mild and the risk of serious danger is limited. However for an Antarctic explorer an adventure is something life threatening , something where the deepest reserves of energy and courage have to be summoned just to reach safety. I lack the courage or faith in my own resources to do things that are extreme, however I am prone to incompetence and that can expose me a bit more than is absolutely necessary.

When I read this poem I think back to a cycle journey my friend and I took along the Ridgeway. It was planned as a full day's ride, a loop including Wantage and Avebury. Something not too extreme except… Except that we decided to do it in February, when days are short and the weather is not the finest, and we set out late so we had too few hours of daylight. Such simple, basic, bad planning.

Nevertheless the first part of the ride was fun, the scenery was good and we had hopes that the challenge could be character building. But as the day wore on the wind blew harder and it took all our strength just to keep moving forward. At the top of Barbury castle our strength was sapped but no worries it was mostly downhill to Avebury but instead of getting there for lunch, it was mid afternoon and we knew we were going to struggle to get back in time. We tried to hurry as much as possible but our legs were not fresh and anyway off-road cycling is comparatively slow. Gradually the night drew in and we could see less and less in front of our wheels, which slowed us down even more as we tried to pick a safe path amid slippery clay, lumpy chalk and deep ruts caused by 4x4s. Eventually we could see nothing - it was pitch dark, without even the moon, and we of course had no lights. We could cycle no further- there might be people who can bike over rough terrain guided only by extrasensory perception, but that was not us. We had to trudge back, pushing our bikes, walking in cleats, stumbling over the uneven land and not knowing where the hell we were and not being able to see where we were going. It was the longest 10 miles I have ever walked and when we arrived at the car we were both totally exhausted, completely weak and I have no idea how I drove home. Even now, many years later I can feel how tired and beaten I was that night.

(I can now use the memory when things get bad in long runs or a marathon. I just tell myself that if I could got back then I can surely finish now).

But when we planned our ride it was not meant to be like that, it was a good day out. "In your dreams you can have your eggs cooked as perfectly as you want but cannot eat them." That is the problem when I plan runs or rides I mostly dream. I imagine what things could or should be like, I create pictures and see myself striding out, but might just as well be floating on a cloud. I do not think about what happens when you push yourself. I do not feel the tiredness, the way muscles weaken, the body aches, and thinking slows down.

It can be good to ignore these things when planning, after all you want to focus on the life-enhancing and it is always comforting to imagine yourself as stronger and faster than you really are. But when you dream it is too easy to be too hopeful about your abilities and as a result find yourself in situations beyond your competence. Perhaps that is what the Antarctic explorer means by an adventure - something that leaves you exposed. 

When planning trips or races I want to do things that will extend me by degrees, push things but not break them, balance dreams with my abilities. I do not want to be exposed I want to find another world... an other competence, wild and constant. 

Vancouver Sun Run

The London marathon is not the only mass participation event in April. In Vancouver there is the world's largest 10k that attracts around 50,000 people. This year it took place on the 19th and not only did my sister's family take part, they excelled.

My sister finished in 51.46 and was 4864, my brother in law managed 45.22 and was 1573, my niece, on virtually no training, managed 59.35, and my brother-in-law's nephew, who doesn't run but lifts weights for exercise, finished in 1.13.43. Now I think all these results are brilliant and some become even better when adjusted for age (my sister finished 17th in her age group and my brother-in-law was 68th). However there is magic in round numbers and the target of breaking 50 minutes and 45 minutes was not quite achieved (in one case by only 23 seconds) so satisfaction was not complete. The quest has to go on and they are now looking for other races in which to break their barriers.

I am sure they will find the right race as they are very close to their targets, especially as it is difficult to run your best in a very crowded race. My biggest race was the Great North Run and my memory is of weaving around other runners, continually slowing down and speeding up so that it was very difficult to maintain a rhythm and build a race pace. I am sure a smaller race, with enough people for an atmosphere but clear space to run in, is a better bet for a PB.

P.S. A list of the largest races is here. In 2008, the Vancouver Sun Run wass 4th, the Great North Run 10th and London was 12th. It will be interesting to see how the economic crash will effect the numbers in 2009. We might run more because it is a relatively cheap and can help us forget about problems but we might enter fewer races because of the cost. Who knows.

P.P.S. I like the names people invent for races and am particularly taken by the Lilac Bloomsday Run. Now I love any run which gives a hat tip to the wanderings of Leopold Bloom but it is run in May when the official Bloomsday is 16th June. I'm sure there must be some good reason for the discrepancy but I have no idea what it is.

Blossom, Sheep and Being Back Outside

Sometimes writing these posts clarifies my mind. When I wrote about the gym being a fitness factory with an ethos of targets and attainments i.e. being like work, I realised how strongly I believe that treating exercise as an end in itself is wrong. It isn’t. It is a gateway to other deeper, more satisfying pleasures.

I do not run to get fit. I run because it opens my eyes, helps me think more clearly, enhances my sense of self and gives me a feeling of (quite unwarranted) satisfaction. Being fitter helps me run better and is therefore desirable but it is only a part of the experience. The ultimate aim is to unite physicality with imagination (without trying to sound too poncey and pretentious).

A lot of the time this does not happen because either one of the mind, body or surroundings is wrong. But sometimes it all comes together and it makes me feel like a new person (and believe me feeling like a new person is something I really appreciate). Knowing these moments happen keeps me going through the duller times.

Trying to rehabilitate an injury in a gym is one of those duller times and writing about it made me realise that spending too much time thinking about the state of my leg is one of the more futile uses of the brain. The body might be OK with endless indoor rehearsals but the mind will only be satisfied when it is outside, feeling the air, sensing the space, and looking around at the changing landscape. Only outside is there is a chance of rediscovering that feeling of connection, especially at this time of year when things change from day to day. Blossom comes and is then blown away, lambs grow at incredible speed and the trees become full and there are different shades of green.

I am not too bothered about how fast I am running or how far I go. I just happy that I am easing myself back and can bookend this post with two pictures from my last run