Enhanced Stability-Nike Sensory Enhancement Technology heightens awareness of foot to help pronation and promote neutral landings
"Nooooo" I cried "you are socks, you cannot do these things. You cannot heighten my awarenes of my own foot. This is gobbledegook! How can I buy something that makes such a ludicrous claim?" So I clicked through to the 'Bridgedale X-Hale Speed Demon Socks' only to see:
The hard-working feet of distance runners taught Bridgedale how to create a sock that offers the best of two worlds: the feel of an ultralight, rapid-drying synthetic sock and the cushioned comfort of a Merino wool sock.
Hard-working feet taught?!
I must stop this and get a grip. I must not worry about the way marketing people fulfil the rquirements of their job by talking nonsense. It is what they do and I am only buying socks. It really shouldn't be complicated. But it is.
This is because everything concerned with running is sold on its technical properties and the promise of superior performance yet there is not one of those claims we can test in any meaningful way. Only a textile scientist can judge the comparative virtues of the different materials used by the different manufacturers. The rest have trust that at least some of the claims are true and that products from trusted manufacturers will do their job. Then we somehow make a choice.
I have no idea how I make purchasing decisions. I am pretty random and perhaps more influenced by image and style than I would like to admit. Am I influenced by the performance claims? - Probably quite a lot. But am I put-off by inflated claims and stupidisms? - Almost certainly.
P.S. As a complete aside (but related to the use of language). I recently listened to someone talking about the disappearance of the Russian cargo ship after it had passed through the English Channel saying that it might represent a modification of the pirate business model.
"Pirate business model!!" I spluttered "They are PIRATES" I then remembered a comedy sketch from the 1990s, from the Million Pound Radio Show, about pirate training days. You can listen to it here if you want
